Ok so basically the new Spooky Manor did everything I wanted and more. Not only did it give me both of the Pokemon I wanted, it gave me a few more gems, and also some neat little opportunities for stupid gimmicks, which I ABSOLUTELY ADORE. Why play the game correctly, amirite? I'm right. And it's available internationally wooooo! Anyway, I'm just gonna go down a few Pokemon of note here in the order in which they are listed on Bulbapedia, because I'm seriously too lazy to think of a way to organize this myself.
Ok, so the first thing of note on this list is Meowth. Yes, Meowth's ability (Unnerve) is SUCKTASTIC. But you can get the move Hypnosis on it here. Ok ok sure maybe Meowth could already have Hypnosis. But only by breeding. And since I'm EXTRAORDINARILY LAZY, I can now just get a male off of the Dream World instead of going through all that TROUBLE to BREED things. Makes life SO much easier. Which leaves me more time to sit around until I turn into a slime mold.
Second Pokemon of note: ABRA. FUCK YEAH FUCKIN MAGIC GUARD ABRA IN THIS BITCH. So happy. Alakazam is a Pokemon who really appreciates this ability. Ok, pretty much any Pokemon would, but Inner Focus seriously? What even is that? This is much better. Now Alakazam can fear priority just that much less (since it can't take an unresisted hit anyway) when using Life Orb. Additionally, you could run a FOCUS SASH in a non-lead position. Entry hazards shmentry hazards. I love focus sashes and always think it's too bad that they SUCK. And here we are with an opportunity to LEGITIMATELY use one. Awesome.
IT'S MIME TIME! Yes ok Technician isn't really all that abusable on Mr. Mime, but you know what? I don't even care. He can still use it to boost Magical Leaf, Charge Beam and Icy Wind, and while Mr. Mime may be a Pokemon who is a hell of a lot more about support moves than dealing damage, I don't even give an ass. I smell a stupid outclassed gimmick set, and that makes me moist.
FUCK YEAH SNIPER ARIADOS FUCK YEAH SNIPER ARIADOS
Next up is Misdreavus. I was makin all those jokes about worthless Dream World additions when I first heard this was gonna be there, but I've changed my tune now that I see it gets INFERNO. Seriously, what a badass move. I've been looking for excuses to use this anywhere I can. And one of my top ideas right now is on Mismagius. With Gravity support, Mismagius can run Inferno at 83% accuracy and also abuse Thunder, which, along with Shadow Ball, gets you some really nice general coverage and especially some nice coverage against standard bulky types. Unfortunately, Mismagius can't use its egg moves with Inferno, so no Nasty Plot, but it can still Calm Mind up, Taunt, Destiny Bond, or I guess just Energy Ball to fill out coverage against bitches like Quagsire who laugh at Calm Mind and can only be neutrally hit by Shadow Ball. Whatever you think fits best.
Oh yeah Smeargle. Available by things that aren't a Japanese exclusive event. Now the only guy from that stupid Pokemon Cafe thing that is both worthwhile and not available to everyone is a breedable Eevee. Also, we now have three of the four fully evolved Moody users to dick around with people. Shit yeah, there's nothing I love more than being a DICK.
Smoochum is out which means I can use Dry Skin Jynx which means I can be even better about making a Tyra Sanchez Pokemon now. She holds a Flame Orb. Because she burns herself. Olololol.
Ralts with Telepathy. Could be interesting I guess. Since Gardevoir gets Heal Pulse now, this could be a decent doubles supporter. Worth looking into.
SABLEYE. OH YES. I HAVE BEEN LOOKING FORWARD TO THIS FOR SO LONG YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW. Man, Sableye with Prankster has so many legitimate uses for disruption with access to Taunt, Will-O-Wisp and Recover. And Sucker Punch and Fake Out. But what I'm most excited about is the ability to run an AWESOME gimmick set that is ENTIRELY luck based, which I will have to go into more detail about next update. Murkrow can do it too, but now that both of these guys are here, it REALLY needs a little analysis. Sweeeeeeeeeeeet.
I. Fuckin. Love Mawile. Mawile is like one of the most adorable Pokemon ever. And Sheer Force? Neat ability bro. Considering the vast majority of its useable movepool is affected. Like Iron Head, Crunch, Rock Slide and all the fangs. That's some fuckin coverage right there. And now I hear it can still have Ice Punch with this ability (although it has to give up on its other lovely fangs). Amazing. Though we'll still have to wait for move tutors if we want Thunderpunch. Yeah, I know Mawile sucks but I don't even care we are best pals for life I would write a song about it if I had any talents whatsoever.
Volbeat and Illumise. Prankster is amazing and is one of the most amazing abusable abilities EVER. The more of these I get the better. Also, a reason to ever use Volbeat and Illumise! Because it's not like anyone was going to even remember that these guys existed, much less use them. Bugs man, amirite?
Ok so finally Shuppet. Yeah ok so they also released that event Banette which was female but you know what? That shit was only available to people from the US or Japan. So if you were for example totally not respectable and decided to list your location as Cameroon, then APPARENTLY the option to get this guy doesn't show up even though you are logging in from the US. Fuck that shit. Whatever, I can still get my Cursed Body Banette. So you can take your event Banette and SHUPPET! Geddit? Haha I'm retarded.
So basically, as soon as the dumbass Dream World decides to actually give me any females at all, I'll be rollin in the Pokemon. Bitchin.
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